It was a cold Sunday morning in February (Bombay standards, at least) and I was wide awake – miracles never cease, do they? Not only was I awake, I was actually pretty calm and put together. I was happy. And that’s honestly what every bride should feel on her wedding day.
The ceremony was in the Gurudwara, a traditional Anand Karaj. We wanted to keep it simple and meaningful no matter what style of wedding and venue we chose. We debated many options while planning the wedding. Being Sindhi, I pray to Guru Nanak and though not overtly religious; the Gurudwara has always felt most peaceful to me. My husband is Gujarati and is largely agnostic. He’d happily have a civil wedding if given a choice. We were sure we didn’t want a noisy affair where all our guests are chewing loudly on all the food while we are taking the holy Pheras in some non-descript corner of the hall. We got lucky – both sets of parents didn’t care what we finally chose as long as it made us happy.
The principle of the Sikh wedding (Anand Karaj) is based on equality. Between male and female; and subsequently between husband and wife. This really appealed to me. It’s what I always wanted from my marriage. It had to be a give and take. It had to be a two way street. Even though we had been together for almost a decade before we got married, and I knew I was extremely lucky – I was marrying my best friend. I still had this niggling fear that marriage would change the equilibrium of our relationship. Did it, though?
It’s been one year to that beautiful morning in February. ONE-WHOLE-YEAR. Wow. Let’s give my brain a moment while it processes this information, okay?
Yup, so it’s been a year and it has indeed been a ride of a lifetime. I won’t lie to you. Life as you know it; does change! This change can be super scary but it can also be pretty frickin’ amazing. You now have two families and double the social commitments. You have more friends and more plans that you just have to be at. But most importantly, you have each other to come home to every-single-day. You have a steady date 365 days a year. You have someone to fuss over you even if you’re running just a slight temperature. You have a travel companion. You have a perpetual date to all social occasions (can’t even begin to explain what an advantage that can be).
And if you’re as lucky as me (I really hope you are!) you have someone who just gets you. Who sees through your soul. Who pushes you to excel. Who laughs at all your jokes – even the not so funny ones. (Come on, we all know that’s the dream!) Who makes you the most amazing coffee in the world. Who lets you whine when it’s the need of the hour. Who doesn’t believe some things are just a ‘woman’s job’. Who contributes. Who partakes. Who just happens to be your better half. Who completes your world.
Thank you husband (sometimes that word still amuses me) but I am not a cynic anymore and it’s because of the love and care you bring to this marriage. I may still be a raging feminist – but that doesn’t stop me from loving the fact that I am, in fact, married. You’re my partner in every sense of the word. And I may not credit you enough, but it takes a Real Man to be with a Real Girl like me. 😉
And given a chance I’d do it all again with a smile on my face and the same feeling of contentment in my heart- even if it’s in the morning; again.
Photo Courtesy: www.amogh.in